The Provisional BBC is a paramilitary organisation which split from the BBC in October 2006 in protest at its toleration of poor writing and Liberal Democrats. The Provisional BBC regrets any civilian casualties resulting from posts contained within, but lays the blame squarely at the foot of the Tories. It is our duty to resist them, by any and all means necessary.

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Kennedy "should pay for treatment"

Liberal Democrat leaders who abuse NHS staff should be charged for their treatment, according to the Liberal Democrats.

"If you get rat-arsed on a Friday night and get taken to A&E where you try to persuade staff their children should be allowed to star in porn movies, is it right for the taxpayers to fund your life-saving treatment?" asked Numpty Lamb, the Lib Dem spokesman on health.

It is not clear what would happen to alcoholics not able to afford life-saving treatment. But Lib Dem Chief of Staff Ed Davey moved to reassure the masses that Scotch Charlie was not short of a bob or two. "The thing about being an MP," said Davey, "is you can't get sacked for turning up to work sozzled."

According to Health Spokesman Lamb, alcoholism is not the only disease whose victims should be forced to pay for their treatment. "Why should the young pay for hip replacements?" asked Lamb, adding "Ming's getting his done on BUPA."

Kennedy maintains he is not an alcholic, never has been, has received professional help to put his alcoholism behind him, and "enjoys a drink or two like everyone else". He denies he is in denial.

Friday, September 07, 2007

Guest column #4 - unknown source

In an occasional series becoming less occasional, the Provisional BBC brings you stories you'd expect to see here, if reputable news outlets hadn't published them first.

About Me

Back after an extended exile from blogging. Depressing to be in opposition but likely to prompt more posts here.