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Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Foreign paedophile loose in Britain

Police have warned a foreign paedophile has been seen in British supermarkets and toyshops.

The man, "Santa", is notorious for breaking into houses and entering the rooms of children, before "filling their sacks with gifts". Santa can be recognised by his trademark white beard, red hat and jolly "ho-ho" laugh. He also goes by the names "Father Christmas" and "St Nicholas".

Shadow Home Secretary David Davis was quick to blame the government for the scandal. "This man is a known offender - he should not have been let into Britain," he said. But asylum campaigners said border controls were useless against magic.

An angry mob gathered at Santa's home in Lapland after the News of the World published his address. Campaigners have called for a "Santa's law", which would force the government to reveal the name, address and shoe size of all popular myths.

The government rejected calls for such a law in 2000, claiming it could drive offenders underground. However, Home Secretary John Reid has recently indicated he may consider a law as part of his leadership campaign.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

S'no joke.

waywoodwind said...

bombers people traffickers

murders honour killers

fraudsters kidnappers

The prisons are full of them

the list goes on

all of them coming to Britain for a better life but allowed to destroy the British peoples health wealth and happiness

Anonymous said...

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About Me

Back after an extended exile from blogging. Depressing to be in opposition but likely to prompt more posts here.