The Provisional BBC is a paramilitary organisation which split from the BBC in October 2006 in protest at its toleration of poor writing and Liberal Democrats. The Provisional BBC regrets any civilian casualties resulting from posts contained within, but lays the blame squarely at the foot of the Tories. It is our duty to resist them, by any and all means necessary.

Friday, December 22, 2006

Cook death a "tragic accident"

An official inquiry into the heart disease that killed Robin Cook has found no evidence the politician was murdered.

Lord Stevens, who led the investigation, said the death was a "tragic accident". But a spokesperson for Compass says it does not accept the findings as questions remain "unanswered".

Compass revealed that over 1000 people have signed a statement saying that if Cook was murdered, his killers should be brought to justice.

They suggest Cook was killed over his opposition to the Iraq war, and demand the body is dug up to prove it was not swapped before tests were carried out.

"We dismiss every semi-colon of this 1000 page dossier as a whitewash," said Compass supremo Neal Lawson. "We will not rest until Robin Cook is knighted, sainted and lauded as the one true God. Together we shall prepare for his second coming, casting out demons and issuing pompous e-mails about the good society."

Mr Cook has been likened to rock legend Kurt Cobain, who also died at the top of his game.

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The Provisional BBC
I'm a member of the Labour Party. I prefer not to define my politics, but have no shame in describing myself as a socialist, or as a democratic centralist. I'm a Christian (Baptist). I'm a 'cellist. I'm an activist for Labour, for various pro-migrant and trade union campaigns. I eat predominantly unhealthy foodstuffs. I follow Wakefield & Emley and Barcelona Football Clubs. I like to win. I have a visceral hatred of Margaret Thatcher; so far as I'm concerned Bevan was being unusually generous when he likened the Tories to vermin.
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