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Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Wright-Phillips announces resignation

Sean Wright-Phillips confirmed his resignation from Chelsea Football Club with immediate effect as of yesterday. Wright-Phillips will continue as a registered player, and maintain his membership of Chelsea Supporters’ Club. He said he was resigning due to “irreconcilable differences” with his boss Jose Mourinho, and in order to campaign for a drawn Premiership.

“It’s not good for the Premiership if Chelsea win by twenty points every year,” said the diminutive right-winger, who failed to fulfil his early promise. He promised to draw up a list of exactly which games needed to be lost and won and by which sides in order to produce joint title-winners. Wright-Phillips, son of BBC football pundit Ian Wright, denied there could be collective action problems, saying “I am an idiot.”

The player was quick to stress he had only resigned from the Chelsea team, and would stay a member of Chelsea Supporters’ Club. This despite rule four section d of the club constitution, which states that supporters may be expelled from the club if they support other teams. The rule was instituted after Arsenal supporters signed up en masse in the 80s, in an attempt to take over the club.

Wright-Phillips also suggested Chelsea owner Roman Abramovich has links to the oil industry. “I’m not bitter,” said the player, adding “Mourinho promised me games. He’s a filthy liar.” Chelsea dismissed the accusations, pointing out Wright-Phillips signed a new contract only last week.

About Me

Back after an extended exile from blogging. Depressing to be in opposition but likely to prompt more posts here.